You know the story, you go home and in front of all the cousins, aunts, uncles and grandchildren your “Favorite” relative asks, “So when are you getting married?” And you realize you aren’t that sersious about the person you are seeing, or you aren’t seeing anyone, and at that moment you make a New Year’s resolution to find the love of your life before this scene is repeated next year.
Already the surge of new sign-ups to E-harmony are filling up my inbox. Something like 80 new matches in the last 3 days, and 10 requests for communiation. Overall E-Harmony has 3 women for every 2 guys. The Numbers get even better if you are a Male in the 21-30 age range, stack on some regional advantages in places like the San Francisco Bay Area, or New York Metro area, and this is the place to be if you are a guy looking for a relationship. Not a good place if you are looking for quick hook up. E-harmony has the rep for making lasting connections. Personally my experience has been that the matching is good enough that I feel enough connection to about 15% of the people I am matched to get to a phone call, about 60% of those are worth a date, and 85% of those turn into several dates. The problem I have found is that the profile matching seems to pick people I like but fails to catch flaws that would make someone incompatible, like prone to throwing Stomping Tantrums, or likes to drink blood, or thinks anyone who drives a vehicle that gets less than 50 miles to the gallon should be drown in a barrel of oil. (real stories I will tell at some point in the future).
Yahoo Singles is a strange place, you can’t tell who is and who is not paid up, so if you fall hopelessly in lust with a girls picture you can send her all the nice messages you want, but there will be no response. Yahoo does profile matching but it is far less strict. You can see anyone’s profile, so you may run into the hot guy or girl from accounting, or your cousin, or your principal, which is weird at best. Yahoo does offer realtime chat with members who are using Yahoo messenger, and that is nice. Rather than stressing in the days between your new found life mate’s responses messages you can get to the heart of her malfunction in a matter of minutes.
Craigslist is free. And done right can produce good results… But you have to practice, and you have to weed out the weirdos. Running an ad on craigs list will get you pictures of naked men. Even if you run it in the straight male, Girl for Girl, or House for rent sections, you are going to get naked men sending you pitures.Once you have come to terms with this, you can begin to think about what you would put in your CL ad. You have to put more into a CL ad because you are relying on your personality to pull in respondents. the good news is any one who responds liked your profile enough to initiate conversation, and enough that they have given your their e-mail address. The downside is anyone you respond to has your address.
Match.com has a balanced Male to female ratio, but is really geared towards a younger crowd, Chris Pirillo met his wife through this service so there are sucess stories, but my experience was that it is filled mostly with profiles that are inactive.
True is really a toned down version of adult friend finder. Would you like a friend with benefits who is ok with it turning in to a relationship? Then this is the place for you. Likely this is not where you will find the person you take home for Thanksgiving.
All in all Online dating is a way to meet people, and the more people you meet the better the odds you will like one of them. Even if you feel like it is hopeless, i you look at dating as an excuse to get out of the house and have fun you can’t lose. $30-50 a month is cheap to know you can always find someone to go to a movie with.