Sony Closes Shop Citing Halo 3 Launch Success

Jack Tretton is giving up on the console market citing the overwhelming the success of competitor Microsoft’s / Bungie’s Halo 3 which sold $170 million in its first 24 hours.

"We fully realize that past success is no guarantee of future success, but it does give you some perspective." says Tretton’s blog "At the end of the day, it’s always been about the games. To push the boundaries of gaming beyond where they currently lie takes a great deal of risk."

Sony’s platform the Play Station 3 was banking on games such as Lair to drive sales, but poor reviews and lack luster sales have lead to Sony’s PS3 in last place amongst the current generation consoles.

 

Faced with imminent defeat, Tretton determined the game division would  honor the Japanese tradition of hara-kiri, and "fall on his sword" rather than continue to shame the rest of the company with its continued disgraceful performance.

Sony will continue to produce PlayStation 2’s however which are still a booming profit center, and encourages game developers to produce future games for that "bargain" platform.

Peter Moore president of EA Sports and formerly of Microsoft says of the ongoing console war "we’re still in the console skirmishes.” Commenting that we’re still in the single-digit millions (maybe, 10 millions for the Xbox 360), in a race that publishers and console manufacturers expect to hit the hundreds of millions."

Nintendo was unavailable for comment at time of press.

 

 

The above is satirical.