Today would have been a Good Day to Call in Gay as Yahoo Layoffs Workers

I’m not saying you should play gay just to keep your job, but I think today would have been a good day to have had a little bit of an edge if you work at Yahoo.  If you were to call in gay, they might think twice about laying you off.

Yahoo is laying off 1500 workers in an attempt to cut $400 million dollars a year from its budget.

“There could be additional staff reductions next year,” said Brad Williams, a Yahoo spokesman. “It depends on the decisions we make about prioritization, and on things we can’t predict in the economy.” Mr. Williams added: “We are trying to instill a culture of cost-discipline in our business.”

Workers will be cut from whole divisions of the company, as Yahoo decides which projects to discontinue.

Yahoo CEO Jerry Yang penned a farewell note to laid off employees.

yahoos,

today, most of our layoffs in the US are happening, and they’ve been underway in other regions around the world.

this is a tough time for all of us and i wanted to take a moment to reach out to you.

saying goodbye to colleagues and friends is never easy. they all are dedicated members of our yahoo! family, who worked beside us and shared our passion.

but as you all know, we must take actions to better perform in today’s turbulent global economy. while we’ve found efficiencies in many parts of our business, laying off employees is unfortunately unavoidable. our difficult decision to let colleagues go reflects the changes we’re having to make to better align costs with revenues – something businesses in virtually every sector are also having to do.

for those who are affected by these layoffs, i am extremely grateful for your contributions to yahoo!. we realize the impact this will have on you. that’s why, consistent with our past practices, we’re making every effort to support you with severance packages and other services.

the reductions we’re making are very hard, but they are also very necessary — as we focus on the long-term health of our business. to those who are leaving us, i extend my heartfelt thanks on behalf of yahoos everywhere — you will be missed.

thanks,
jerry

 

Apparently grammar and punctuation are not one of Jerry’s strong points, or maybe the laid off employees just aren’t worth the effort of capitalizing a letter or two every so often.  Jerry doesn’t apologize for any of his HUGE mistakes that brought Yahoo to this point, nor mention that if he’d sold Yahoo when he had the chance to Microsoft he likely wouldn’t be cutting these jobs.

Oh, well, they are only Minions.